RECORD LAWSUIT BACKLOG over S. Bond Herndon's Tell All book

THE AGONIZING TRUTH Agony, Texas (cir. 316)
October 6, 2011
Jackson Tuck, Editor

Agony Annex, closed after Ethel Noon
swooned (with all the paperwork)

The Vinegaroon county clerk office, Agony Annex, was over run when more than sixty-four suits were filed today, mostly aimed at author S. Bond Herndon to stop publication of his new tell-all book, supposedly about life, here in Agony.


"Well just bury him in paperwork!" The lawyer for the group, J. Dagwood Holmgren told the AT.  "He'll have to deal with us before we let him see daylight..."


Meanwhile, the notorious Mulligan Gang is still incensed that they have yet to find a way to thwart Herndon's plans.  

Last known photo of H.D. Mulligan (not sure which)
He was born with bad twitches, and no prison or
state photos have been made in focus

"Bab-ba-lu, baby, we gonna do some tap-dancin', we find this here feller..." Harley Davidson Mulligan told the AT over the phone from Huntsville Penitentiary (where he is currently due for parole in 2023). 



Mr. Herndon's book seems to have opened a can of worms that leads back to several of the Mulligans, dating back to 1968, when our town held its, quite memorable, centennial celebration.  As you know, it got a little out-of-hand, however, it is also the time when Charles Speck III (Our town Doc) came to town.  That is the story Herndon followed to reveal not only the Mulligan's nefarious activities, but quite a few other secrets, some so dark, for their time, that they left indelible impressions on our town...impressions we can not shake away from our dreams.

We think something like this happened
with JJ and his Uncle No-Nose Mulligan

Further complicating the potential for disaster, rumor now has it that JJ (Jessie James) Mulligan has made a play for power over the family interests, which, remarkably, still include their 'Salvage Yard' and a lot of barren desert hiding who-knows-what?  


"Them boys are bad news..." Said Cletus (Our Town Constable).  "They use look-outs, and stuff like that.  They real organized, n'all."

Cletus, a pretty good scout himself

As you know, it is Cletus' turn to work as our constable, unfortunately, it has happened at a time when we desperately need lawmen with True Grit, not those who must eat their grits before giving chase when chase is due.


"Clete, hell, he's a good hand, in the saddle.  Good long-range spotter, if he ain't drinking much..." Said one associate of the man-now-on-the-hot-seat.  "But, he ain't gonna be no good tangling with Mulligans.  These here Mulligan's ain't his daddy's Mulligans, if you know what I mean.


As I close this article, I am sad to report that Ethel Noon has reported that it may take longer than expected to file all the new paperwork. Her normal workload of court filings, generally relegated to land and livestock purchases and oil rights.  


"My lawd, I've never felt so much hate, from so many!" Ethel said, just before she swooned again and was taken to Dr. Speck's for observation.


The lawsuits may well take longer to reach the ear of the court than it will take Herndon's publisher Truesource (Imagine House Imprint) to get "A Week in Agony...Texas" on the shelves.


Next time in: THE AGONIZING TRUTH
Just what did Herndon find out when he spent all that time visiting with Dr. Speck?  And, where has the original tell-all mouthpiece 'Travis Drylander' run off to? Those questions and more in the next issue.